By Nils
Why does Mommy always pick things up that should be on the floor? Sippy cups full of water, spoons covered in yogurt, large handfulls of oatmeal... these things belong on the kitchen floor. I put them there with great intention. Why does she keep giving them back to me?!
Mommies don't know anything about refined palates. What she sees as stray bits of cardboard from the cats' scratching boards, I see as delicacies.
A coy smile can get you places. Scramble over to the dvds and take a gander. Is the door unlocked? Open it. Pull out every dvd you can reach. Pull them out in a frenzy, and try to get every single one onto the floor before Mommy comes over. If Mommy notices you at any point during this foray, utilize that coy smile and glint in your eyes to charm her into letting you play. If you get to the dvds and the door happens to be locked, wail in misery and bang against it like it was your last chance at freedom.
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