Words of Wisdom from Carolena
Cheese is food from heaven. Eat it as often as Mommy will let you. Stand by the fridge and politely say, "cheese?" If Mommy declines, voice your disapproval and cling to the fridge like it's a life-raft. If you see a bowl of cheese on the table sneak over and use the serving spoon to take a big bite. Who cares that it's Parmesan! Take another bite! Cheese, glorious cheese!
If you wake up from your nap and find that you have pooped, don't call out for Mommy. Hang out in your crib for a while. Take off your diaper to make yourself more comfortable. Don't play with or touch the poop in the diaper. That would be undignified. Rather, simply enjoy the freedom of your newly undiapered bottom. Read some books. Practice some of the new words you've learned lately. Perhaps sing a song. After a while call Mommy. When she comes to the door, nonchalantly lean over the side of your crib and offer her your soiled diaper with a casual, "Hi Mommy. Poop."
The vacuum is not to be trusted. Do not show it fear. If it dares show
its loud ugly face scream at it. Run, yell, show it who's boss. The
vacuum is an elusive beast who rarely ventures out of the cave in which
it lives. Take heart: the good news is if the vacuum is out then company
is surely close at hand.
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