The Whoppie Chronicles

There are some things in motherhood that have proven to be entirely elusive: getting to the dentist, making phone calls in general, and evidently, cleaning off the potting soil that mysteriously jumped out of the plant's container and onto a picture frame in the kitchen. These are things that escape me.

When I was pregnant with Carolena the rector's family at our church in Austin threw a baby shower for us and our baby received this:




OH NO!!! WE DON'T EVEN HAVE A PICTURE!!

*gasp for air*get a grip*
type, woman, type
*breathe. in. out. in. out.*


When I was pregnant with Carolena someone gave us the cutest little blankie for our babe. It was a sweet little frog that I knew with a mother's instinct our baby would gravitate to as his or her favorite. And by "mother's instinct" I mean it was sofffttt. And cute. And just the right size. And, as I found out later as I ventured further into the world of motherhood, incredibly popular among children for just those reasons.

In those days a decree went out from Doctor Kish that all the pregnant named Casey Duncan should go on bed rest. This was the first bed rest and was taken while Chris was curate of Good Shepherd. Chris also laid around and ate pizza because he is of the house and lineage of awesome. He ordered Netflix, to be watched with Casey, to whom he was married who was expecting her firstborn child. While they were there, the time came that she should be delivered. And she gave birth to her firstborn daughter and wrapped her in bands of cloth, because that's what people still do today, and laid her in a hospital grade plastic bassinet, because that's what you do in present day North America.

Luke 2!

We brought home our sweet Carolena, she fell in love with her dear little blankie, and Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da life went on. Some time later she named him her "Whoppie Frog" and the two of them became fast friends. A second Whoppie was purchased when she began school marking a new phase in life of "School Whoppie" and "Home Whoppie." They got along charmingly and often got to have slumber parties at Home Whoppie's digs. All was well. At some point along the way one of the Whoppies went missing. Where oh where could that little frog be? Fortunately, with two, there was little fuss and we kept on truckin.

Last week... a moment of silence please... we lost another Whoppie.

WHERE THE *&%! IS THAT FROG?!?!

I know it's in our house. I remember specifically putting it on a chair in our living room when we were leaving the house. The kids were already in the car. I came in to grab my purse, picked up both of their blankies and put them on the chair. We came home and they both grabbed their blankies and played at home all afternoon. Bedtime came and the usual bedtime routine started: bath, brush teeth, read books, search the entire house for Whoppie.... except... he was nowhere to be found...

We (and by "we" I mean Chris and me) have looked everywhere. In every nook and cranny. In dressers. In the couches. In drawers. In the pantry. I've moved furniture. I've even looked in between mattresses and box springs. I've even returned to my Roman Catholic schooling and prayed to Saint Anthony. He is gone. Vanished. AWOL.

The interesting thing is: Carolena doesn't seem to care. I asked her if she misses him. I got a half shrug and a "yes and no." She hasn't looked for him or cried for him at all. Perhaps she was just ready to move on. She is the kid who moved herself out of her crib after all.

I'm not a very sentimental person when it comes to material possessions. I grew up a child of the Treasure House. Chris recently found me gazing upon my childhood rocking horse and when he asked me what I was thinking I replied, "Think we should get rid of that thing?" I am sure he was expecting a fond memory depicting five year old Casey in a hat and bandana. I wrote my thesis on the Gospel of Luke for a reason my friends.

But when it comes to Carolena's missing Whoppie Frog(s) I am a little heartbroken. I do still have my childhood blankie and I want her to have hers. I realize that at some point in life my Carolena will outgrow her blankie. Perhaps that's what has happened. Although, based on her current relationship with Howie (Whoppie's best friend) and the mass amount of stuffed animals residing in her bed I am inclined to think she just lost Whoppie and is handling it exceptionally well. Yesterday I asked her to help me find him and she reassured me saying, "He hopped off to a beautiful place and died. Don't worry. I'll just see him again in the Resurrection."

Faith like a child, my friends. Faith like a child.

We have a quick trip to Austin planned for tomorrow so luckily we have a Whoppie solution. The first time we took Carolena back to Austin we made a big deal about it being her birth city. We drove past our old house and the hospital where she was born. When we passed by a little boutique baby store I pointed it out to her as the place Whoppie came from (it is). There are many things in this life of motherhood that are elusive to me. Whoppie Frog is not going to be one of them. We've had Home Whoppie and School Whoppie. Now we're going to bring Carolena to the place where Whoppie's are born and let her adopt another one. Geeze, you should buy some stock in Angel Dear, I hear they make a killing on repeat business.

Hey, look at that! I found a photo: