W.O.W.

Words of Wisdom, By Carolena

Looking for ways to stall when it comes to getting in your car seat? Here are some suggestions:
1. As soon as you get outside casually propose that you "wok" instead of drive.
2. Yell, "hot!" as soon as Mommy or Daddy puts you in the seat. It doesn't matter if your seat actually is too hot or not, it's hot outside so they won't doubt your sincerity. Just for good measure you could say it three times in a row, "hot hot hot" just like the song Mommy sings when putting you in the car.
3. Try to sit in the seat next to your car seat. Mommy will give you some gobble-dee-gook about "the law" but you should sit in the spot of your choice. Go for the backseat or wiggle to try and get into the trunk space.
4. If all else fails, squirm. Claw. Scream. Whatever you do: don't go in without a fight.

On "meet your teacher" day at school you should really make yourself right at home. Grab all of the stuffed animals you can hold and walk around the room finding new locations for them to reside. Watch another kid pull out a box of toys and dump it on the ground and then with an annoyed look on your face bend down singing your clean up song and put them all back where they belong. Don't drop your stuffed animals while doing so. When the teacher announces is "circle time" go and sit down as close to her as humanly possible. When she asks, "does anyone know what's in my circle bag?" yell, "circle!" Participate joyfully in all of the songs and games. When it's time to leave (which will come far too soon) cry and try to get back to the classroom as your parents carry you back to the car. You won't really know why your mom keeps calling you "Hermione" but that "school" place was awesome. You'll want to go back again soon.