Over the River and Through the Woods

Some tips from Carolena on visiting Grandma and Granddaddy's house

Sleep late the morning of a scheduled visit. Going to Grandma and Granddaddy's house is an exhausting outing. There will be ducks to feed, gardens to explore, and grandparents to woo. There will be cats to meow at, new toys to play with, and lots of office equipment to examine. Trust me on this, you will need a good night's sleep before this adventure.

Once your mom thinks you've slept "too late" she'll pop her head into your room and announce that it's time to get up. Cheer! Let out a big "Yeah!" and begin to gather all of the things you want to bring to show Grandma and Granddaddy. Your mother will probably ask you to narrow it down to two things. The choice should be obvious: two Minnie Mouse stuffed animals of course!

When you get to G&G's house don't immediately ask to go feed the ducks. You are older and wiser now. That was the first thing you asked when you were a baby. Now, you should yell, "knock knock!" outside their door and then march proudly inside and present a Minnie to each person. Be sure to say, "hi" in your best southern belle accent.

Before long Grandma will ask you if you want to go help Granddaddy pick some vegetables from his garden. By all means say, "yes!" Going to Granddaddy's garden is awesome. First, you'll go outside and look in the ponds. Every time you spot a fish you should make a fish face at them so that they know you love them. On your way back toward the garden peek into the cat houses and meow so they know you're here. Cats love toddlers. They'll appreciate your announcement of your arrival. When you get back to the garden Granddaddy will take you on the grand tour and let you pick ripe vegetables to hold and bring home.

When you arrive back inside carefully place each of your vegetables in a paper bag. Insist on holding the bag. You are the one who did all of the hard work. You deserve the honor of being the one to carry the bag.

After checking out the garden you're now ready for one of your favorite activities in the entire world: feeding Grandma's ducks. Start loudly quacking at her with a questioning look on your face. She'll get the idea. Together, you will go to the garage and get the corn. You'll hold hands and carefully cross the street. Then, once you are safely at the pond you'll get to feed the ducks! Be sure every single morsel of corn is out of the bucket before you return home. Sometimes Grandma tries to go back home with corn still in the container. This is unacceptable. Be sure to let her know you will not stand for it and every single grain of corn must be thrown to the ducks.

When you return to Grandma's ask her for a snack. All of that duck feeding has made you hungry. A big cold glass of milk and some peanut butter pretzels will really do the trick.

Eventually your mom will announce that it is time to go home. Give Grandma and Granddaddy big hugs and kisses. Be sure to grab your vegetables and Minnies on the way out. When you get in the car, flash your mom a big smile and exclaim, "happy!" Just for good measure you could say "happy" repeatedly for a while in the car. After a big morning at Grandma and Granddaddy's you are happy indeed.