Monday, June 29, 2015

Smile, But Don't Nod

I recently had a political/religious conversation with a new friend. She shared her views, and I put on my best clergy spouse smile and tried to fully engage the conversation.

The thing is: we aren't close. We could be someday, but we haven't known each other long enough and this was our first conversation of depth. Unfortunately, (unbeknownst to her when she brought it up I think) it was a topic that we weren't going to see eye to eye on.

I really like this person. I really want to be real friends. I want to have conversations of depth with her. This was not the conversation though in which my well thought out opinions were going to have any impact on her. We just aren't at that level of friendship (yet?). I graciously listened to her. I spoke my mind about things I find to be "interesting," but didn't give a direct response (which she didn't ask for) on my political or religious view on the topic.

I got home and told Chris about the conversation and imagine that this is how her conversation with her husband went:

Her: I talked to Casey about {topic} for a while today.
Him: What did she say?
Her: Not much, now that I think of it...
Him: Then she probably disagrees with you and was being polite.
Her: Do you think so? But she's a Christian. She's the pastor's wife!
Him: What denomination are they?
Her: Uhhh... I don't remember... she calls him a priest though...
Him: Episcopalian?
Her: Yes! That's it!
Him: She's Episcopalian? What kind of car does she drive? Does she shave her legs?
Her: Huh. She has a Prius, and I'll have to check out her legs next time I see her.
Him: Honey, believe me, she definitely doesn't agree and was just being polite.

The day I bought the Prius!
I hope we end up good friends anyway!

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

The Rich Woman and Lazarus

There was a rich woman who was dressed in Banana Republic and carrying a Thirty-One bag who feasted sumptuously every day. And each day she got into her Prius and left her comfortable home in suburbia and drove past Lazarus.

She passed by Lazarus, a child in the projects receiving a crap education in a poor school district. She pitied Lazarus. But not enough to vote for education reform. Not enough to blame anyone other than the child's parents, who were also raised in the projects. Who were also given a crap education and no chance or money for college. Not enough to blame anyone other than his mother with her high school education working two jobs and statically doomed to make 64 cents to every dollar a white male makes. Yes, she pitied Lazarus. But not enough.

And she passed Lazarus in the prison cell where he, in her opinion, sat rightfully awaiting his death sentence. Without thought to the possibility of human error in the justice system, without thought of mercy, without thought of the right to life, without second guessing whether or not humanity has the God-given right to take a person's life, she had no pity for Lazarus. She didn't think of Christ's direction to visit those in prison. John the Baptist, St. Peter, and St. Paul in prison did not cross her mind. And she passed by Lazarus, thankful that he was locked away, saying, "Good. He got what he deserves."

And on her way home stood Lazarus with a cardboard sign, a cardboard sign of lies perhaps. But, nevertheless, there he was day after day. She felt a pang of guilt as she passed him by and debated whether or not to give him a hand out. But, there-in was her problem. Why should this man get a hand-out? She had to work hard to get where she was in life. No one gave her any hand outs. She saw not her white privilege or access to good education and health care. She thought not of all of the great jobs given to her because she knew someone and had connections. She thought not about the edge that money had always given her - the extra curricular activities her parents were able to put her in, the theater tickets they were able to purchase, the good health care, and the opportunities afforded her due to her relative wealth compared to that of Lazarus. She thought not of these things. In fact, none of them even occurred to her as "hand-outs" or "coddling" or even help. They didn't occur to her at all. Instead, she readjusted her air conditioner, turned up the radio, and compared herself to those with more than she. She thought only of those with more money, more expensive cars, bigger homes, and finer clothes. They were rich. She wondered how Lazarus always managed to find a Sharpie. Working to not meet his eye, she shook off her smidgen of guilt and passed him by.

Later that evening Lazarus set plates of steaming hot food before the woman's family. She never met her waiter's eyes, choosing instead to simply bark orders, never thanking him or acknowledging his existence, his humanity. No tip was left because of his "poor service" and she left the restaurant shaking her head and chatting with her husband about the fact that "no one knows how to work hard any more these days." She then went for a manicure where Lazarus carefully polished her toenails. She once again never looked into his face, choosing instead to talk on the phone, complaining to a friend about border control, "them", and finally, the sheer volume of toys she had to purchase for her children for Christmas this year.

Lazarus, covered with sores, longed to satisfy his hunger with even what fell from the rich woman’s table. At night the stray dogs would come and lick his sores. The poor man died and after an unnoticed government cremation was carried away by the angels to be with Abraham.

The rich woman also died and was buried with no expense spared. The city mourned the loss of such an advocate for the poor and neglected. The rich woman's fundraising galas would not be missed for long, a new rich woman would soon step in to take over throwing expensive parties to raise funds for the disenfranchised.

In Hades, where she was being tormented, the rich woman looked up and saw Abraham far away with Lazarus by his side. Still seeing Lazarus as one beneath her, she called out, “Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the tip of his finger in water and cool my tongue; for I am in agony in these flames.”

But Abraham said, “Child, remember that during your lifetime you received your good things, and Lazarus in like manner evil things; but now he is comforted here, and you are in agony. Besides all this, between you and us a great chasm has been fixed, so that those who might want to pass from here to you cannot do so, and no one can cross from there to us.”

She said, “Then, father, I beg you to send him to my father’s house— for I have five brothers—that he may warn them, so that they will not also come into this place of torment.” Abraham replied, “They have Moses and the prophets; they should listen to them.” She said, “No, father Abraham; but if someone goes to them from the dead, they will repent.” He said to her, “If they do not listen to Moses and the prophets, neither will they be convinced even if someone rises from the dead.” 


That's how I read this story in Luke. And I can envision endless versions of Lazarus... which is why the story of the rich man and Lazarus scares the shit out of me. 

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Clergy Spouse Confessions

One of the things that can sometimes be most difficult for me about being a clergy spouse is being around all of our priest friends in one gathered space. Not for a party or social occasion (in fact I love that), but for a holy event - for church celebrations. No, it's not their matching dog collared ensembles or inherent love of port wine. It's much harder to explain than that.

We spent the morning at the deacons' ordinations, and I had a blast. It was holy and lovely to spend time celebrating the ordinands and visiting with friends. We enjoyed a beautiful reception and then went on to a party with great friends. It was a truly great day.

And then we got home and I sunk into such a foul mood that when Chris announced he was going to mow the lawn I screeched, "Oh no you aren't! I am." Because there was no way I was going to let the opportunity to slosh around in the mucky yard pushing a heavy piece of machinery while only its loud buzzing filled my brain pass me by. I needed that blissful alone time to think. And growl. And feel annoyed. Luckily, the Psalmist shows us that this can be prayer too.

So what is it that's so hard about having so many clergy friends?
They are just so darn sure of their role in the Church. They know their place in life and they live it.

And it leaves me asking, "But what about me?"

The clergy have a place and they know what it is. They may have run to it with open arms crying "Here am I Lord! Send me!" They may have hidden or begged off or pleaded "please send someone else." But they know what it is. They get up in the morning and put on those dog collars and head out the door. They felt what they refer to as "the call" and they answered it. Meanwhile the rest of us slug around through life wondering where our places are and how we fit into the life of the Church.

Or maybe not. Maybe you know your place. 

Personally, I have some ideas about my place in the Church. Unfortunately, my first choice is an unpaid position and thus not one I will seek to fill. I've already committed to raising two children, and I intend on sending them to college without huge debts accrued. Thus, I will eventually have to find an income once kiddos are in school. In the meantime I'll guess I'll just have to keep floundering and wondering and crying out "where do I fit in?!"

Don't get me wrong: surrounded by our clergy family friends is truly one of my favorite places to be in the entire world. In many ways, they are my people. Clergy family to clergy family: they "get" us. But man, it can sometimes be rough to be seeking one's own place in the Church and surrounded by people so sure of their own.

Luckily, there is always prayer.
And long grass and a muddy lawn and a big loud heavy lawn mower to push around.

Friday, June 19, 2015

Best Buds

Nils has really moved his way up on the fun-ness scale when it comes to playing with Carolena. I recently managed to see (without her noticing my presence) Carolena toss her arm around his shoulders and exclaim, "Nils, you're my best bud! Did you know that?! You're my best bud!" I think my old grinch heart grew three sizes that day.

All Aboard!
Yesterday afternoon Carolena and Nils started playing a game with a simple premise: take turns hitting one another and laughing. On the one hand (which we shall call "reason") I knew it would quickly disolve into tears and fighting. On the other hand (which we shall call "motherhood" or "survival mode") I realllly just wanted to drink my Diet Coke Diet Dr. K and zone out for a second.  Plus, at that moment they were laughing.


Shockingly, shockingly, the game ended and they each moved on to something else. I left the living room for five seconds (a mother's gotta pee sometime) and when I came back (literally like one minute later) found that Nils had a pen and was attempting to color the ottoman. Luckily, he was using the wrong end.


Not only had Sir Nils managed to get into that mischief. He had also used crayon on the couch and spread dirt from a house plant and ground it into the carpet. How did he get so much accomplished in so little time? I mean, seriously, I was tempted to not even be mad and just be impressed. That kid is an overachiever! Just finding a pen and getting to the ottoman would have been enough of a feat. Proud as my pirate side was, alas, parenting must be done. I would rather be a mother raising my children rather than just watching them grow up. He was sent to time out and then had to "help" me clean up the mess. You can see from this picture how helpful he was:


Nils was forbidden from using any writing implements for the rest of the day so Carolena decided to work on her Top Secret Father's Day Poster (that Daddy knows about because it keeps getting left on the kitchen table but he pretends to not notice because he is in fact a great dad) in the "pie-vacy" of her own room.


And mommy drank a rum and coke last night with dinner. Hello, Friday. What new adventures do you hold for us?

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Clergy Spouse Confessions

Chris was first ordained in June 2009 (in the Episcopal church you are ordained first to the transitional deaconate and then later to the priesthood). So, six years ago this month! And during this time I have made a few observations from my spousal point of view...

Confession: clergy spouses crave community.
Confession: clergy spouses (at least I have found) seek community with one another.
Confession: clergy spouses fall into two camps. There are the whiners. And everyone else.

Well, that about sums up life as a clergy spouse. Now, bring me a slice of leftover wedding cake and some rum and let's call it a day.

What? You expect some sort of explanation of that? *sigh* Well, alright. I'll do my best.

Confession: clergy spouses crave community.
Well, don't we all? I believe that we (humanity) were created for community. God himself is a triune being who exists as community. Clergy spouses, I have found, often have a spoken desire for community. I don't think it is necessarily a different or deeper desire than that of anyone else, but, in my experience, it is articulated and intentionally sought after. Why this might be the case is open to more speculation and I have plenty of thoughts. Too many in fact to go into here. If you want to talk about it come over and we'll drink coffee or rum according to the time of day.

Chris' ordination to the deaconate June 2009

Confession: clergy spouses (at least I have found) seek community with one another.
This too, is open to speculation and I can only speak to my experience. However, thus far, in my six year tenure as a clergy spouse I have found that other spouses (of any denomination) perk up immediately when they hear about this particular role in my life. I think it has to do with understanding. Everyone wants to feel understood, right? Back to that whole craving community thing. Perhaps clergy spouses crave one another because we "get" each other in a way that others don't fully understand.

I recently became friends with a pastor's wife of a different denomination in town. She told me that I am the only pastor's spouse she knows and said this with an expression of deep relief on her face. I can't imagine what her life has been like until now. Her husband works for what most would call a mega-church. How has she not had anyone to call on days when her entire Sunday morning fell apart due to kids with fevers? Or kids getting too crazy in the pew? How alone has she felt on Sundays when friends have introduced her to new people as "the first lady" (ugh, never do that. We haaaatteeee that)? Who listens compassionately and then tells her to suck it up when her husband leaves tuck-ins to her because he has to head to the hospital? Who helps her laugh through the busy seasons and knows to leave packages of coffee and cookies on her doorstep when she's home alone during all of September, Advent, and Holy Week? Wait... why don't my friends know that?

Yeah, clergy spouses crave community as much as everyone else does. We find it in a variety of places. I am lucky enough to have a truly fabulous community in our church home. I am also lucky enough to have a great support network of spouses to call when (*ahem*) too many people ask me questions that require me to answer laughingly "I don't work here!"

People, seriously! I love you. I really do, but stop asking me these things. I never know! I don't work there!

Chris' ordination to the deaconate June 2009

Confession: clergy spouses fall into two camps. There are whiners. And everyone else.
Isn't this true of everything? I try to fall into the latter camp. One of my favorite friends in the spouse world has been a clergy spouse for 40 years or so. She and her husband married in their twenties and he is now near retirement. Their children are grown and have children of their own. Her attitude is this, "I choose to be happy." Now, isn't that a great outlook on life? Fabulous. She once spoke (spontaneously) at a spouse retreat (yes, we do that) about how her husband can be a bit of a work-a-holic. Truth be told, my husband is not a work-a-holic (thanks Chris, good job!) but all clergy family can sometimes feel like the church is an extra spouse. Anyway, she said that her husband works so much. Her words? "What am I gonna do? I can't change him. Lord knows I've tried! I'm not gonna divorce him. I love him. So, a long time ago I chose to be happy. So that's what I do. I choose to be happy."

Wow, typed out that sounds crazy and unhealthy. But I know her. And it isn't. It's awesome. She decided to accept the things she can't change for what they are and make changes in her own life accordingly. Instead of pouting that her husband was at work (which is sometimes super awkward, "What do you mean you're going to go bless someone dying?! I thought we were going to watch The Blacklist together!") she took on a life of her own. She made a life for herself and enjoys their life together. Certainly something for all spouses (of any occupations) to aspire.

I hear more coffee percolating so there is nothing in the world that is going to keep my hiney glued in this chair any longer.

Go in peace to love and serve the Lord!

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Kitcheny

I went with what I interpret as Kelly's artistic rule of thumb to solve the great kitchen dilemma: just keep adding more until you love it or utter a cuss word so horrible you didn't even know you knew it.

I added more paint (frames around some of Carolena's artwork) and then stood and stared. I put things on top of cabinets and took them back down. I added a starfish to the wall. I swapped out our kitchen chairs with one of our dining room benches. I panicked that I was ruining our awesome kitchen. I reminded myself that I could just put things back and grab out the original paint color. Eventually I just had to walk away.

I woke up this morning and love it.

Go figure.


Tuesday, June 16, 2015

awww mannnnn

I was wrong. I DO in fact want to blog about yesterday's project today.

*sigh*

Something about it isn't quite right.

I hate that feeling! I like when I work on something and then think "nailed it!" and smile and feel great every time I see it. That's not what's happening with our Mexico inspired doorway. It isn't quite right. Grrrr. I'm going to have to stare at it a while and think think think. First of all (and perhaps this is the only thing?) it's the wrong color. I tried to make it a free project by just using a "close enough" color I had on hand. Damn it. That doesn't seem to be the only problem though.

I think the main problem is that you don't enter and exit our house through Mexico. Aha! Yep, that's it. Damn.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

Monday, June 15, 2015

Caped

A year or two ago my mother showed up with a Christmas tree skirt for Carolena to wear as a cape.

Yes, that's the way we roll around here.

And then Carolena watched Frozen 50,000 times and her cape became "Anna's cape" and made its way into the costume box for more frequent caped escapades.

My friends, Nils has discovered the cape. And, not surprisingly... it... is... a... HIT.
King Nils. What a guy. 




Tune in tomorrow to find out what Nils, Carolena, and I surprised Chris with when he got home from work today. Hint: it involved $0, a ladder, paint from our garage, and lots and lots of painters' tape.



Actually, I'm not sure I'll care about blogging it by tomorrow. Here:
Nils helped me tape...

Carolena helped me paint...

and, voila!

Friday, June 12, 2015

The Wonderful Adventures of Nils

Earlier this week I stood in the kitchen making the kids' lunches to bring to the splashpad. Sandwich? Check. Watermelon? Check. I grabbed a small bag of Cheetos, split it between their two boxes, then tossed the empty bag into our very full, very stinky, very disgusting kitchen trash can.


And then along came Nils.


Nils proceeded to peer down into the trashcan. He looked up at me and exclaimed, "I shall pretend that I am in a smart restaurant and that this is the lobster pond!" He then snatched up the empty chip bag and with a tip of his top hat, he was gone.


I later found the chip bag dump unceremoniously exactly one step out of the kitchen.


Last Sunday I squirted a blob of whipped cream into Nils' hand. He looked up at me with that impish smile, rubbed his hands together... and then wiped them through his hair.

Thursday, June 11, 2015

How to Win Friends and Influence People

Sitting in the back of my parent's minivan (or was it the Astro by then?) on the way to my first week at Camp Allen's overnight camp I clearly remember my dad's very solid advice: "Just tell the girls in your cabin this story and everyone will want to be your friend!" The story was a captivating, especially to a third grader, and involved little Jimmy in boy scout camp, a bunch of shaving cream, and a shower stall. I showed up at camp with my ginormous duffel, my bedside fan, and my ace in the hole story. I settled in for the night and began my tale.

I had a great week that first year at camp. How could I not? It was camp! I had candy and did arts and crafts every single day! I swam and swam and swam. Messy games, fun songs, more swimming (there wasn't actually that much to do in those days besides swim), it was a great week. The last night one of my bunk mates sat in my bed chatting. "You know," she remarked in that third grader candid kind of way, "you're pretty cool. It's too bad Regina George told all of us to not be your friend at the beginning of the week."

Luckily for me, I'd been too busy having fun to realize that I hadn't made any friends.

I've been going to boot camp on Friday mornings for about six months now. It's the same faces each week. And those are the faces that I tend to see on Mondays and Wednesdays as well. Most people go with a friend, but I fly solo as my workout buddy hates bootcamp (and is now preggo and traveling across the entire country for the next few months).

Last week we went outside to run and a group of girls commented on the skunk smell. "Oh, man!" I said, "When I was pregnant..." and proceeded to tell a fabulous story about being pregnant with my second child, a skunk smell caught in our car air conditioner, and throwing up on my feet.

Nailed it.

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Simpy Symphonic

I found out yesterday morning that the Houston Symphony's summer series would play in Katy that same evening. And you know what I love about Chris? That I mentioned it to him and his response was, "have fun!"

He's not a "you're going tonight tonight?!" kind of husband. He's not a "you're leaving me home alone with the kids and I have to get them bathed and in bed by myself?!" kind of dad. He's not even a "who are you going with?" kind of guy. He's a "have a great time! Wish I could go too!" keeper of a dude. Those time when he is a whiner (sorry Chris) it's usually because he wants to go too and not because he wants to hold me back. I digress... the point is...

I went!

None of my friends were free, but I didn't really anticipate that anyone would respond to a 10am text inviting them to a symphony performance that night. But something about going to my first Weight Watcher's meeting was empowering in an "I do what I want" kind of way (yeah, like I needed more of that side to my personality). Or perhaps that's why I went to ww in the first place? Whatever, I feel a little like Mole lately, "The Mole never heard a word he was saying. Absorbed in the new life he was entering upon, intoxicated with the sparkle, the ripple, the scents and the sounds and the sunlight, he trailed a paw in the water and dreamed long waking dreams." When I hear of something I want to do, I want to do it! So I do! And it's made life grand.

The Houston Symphony was ten minutes from my house. It was free. It was calling to me. So I threw on a summery outfit, tossed a good book in my purse, and headed out. I got there nice and early and grabbed a seat front row center.


I'm convinced that this is in fact not prime seating for the symphony, but figured, what the hell. When else will I ever get the chance to sit front center to view the Houston Symphony?!

It was fabulous of course. Beautiful. Powerful. Symphonic. During a Q&A with the conductor I learned that when a seat comes open in the Houston Symphony they entertain around 200 auditions. 200! for one seat! There are 89 members (most of them were there last night) and evidently, the words "symphony," "philharmonic," and "orchestra" are all synonyms. The conductor said that the three are interchangeable and assigned to a group by the founders. Good to know!

Well, "see the Houston Symphony perform" wasn't on my 2015 to-do list, but it should have been. Best summer ever continues and it's only June 10th! Wednesday, what adventures will you bring?

Sunday, June 7, 2015

“after all, the best part of a holiday is perhaps not so much to be resting yourself, as to see all the other fellows busy working.”

When it's fall, fall is my favorite season. When it's "winter," "winter" is my favorite (it gets quotation marks because... well... Texas) but, man oh man, when summer comes...
 
There's just something about summer. I think it's because I live in a southern state on the coast that just makes it so darn easy to celebrate summer. I love the fall, but its hard to do fall-like things everyday when you're still wearing short sleeves and sweating buckets. In fact, just read that sentence again and substitute the word "winter" in for fall. Spring is fun... but mainly as a precursor to the jubilant summer. In fact, right now it technically still is spring... but we're calling it summer. We start the summer season early and stretch it out for as long as possible because we've got a lot of hot and sweaty months to spend along the waterfronts down here.

As mentioned and mentioned and mentioned, we kicked off summer '15 with one of my favorite vacations ever. We came back home and immediately went into my "rule" of doing something fun and summer-y every single day. So, we got a new kid pool (last year's cracked) and put up a clothes line for hanging wet clothes and towels. Carolena really wants to start hanging all of our clothes on it from the washing machine. I could totally dig that if it weren't going to be more work for me... but I mean... I'm barely keeping Mount Everest at bay here. Perhaps I'll throw the sheets out there sometimes. That does sound wonderful.

The pool has been thoroughly inaugurated through both a party with Carolena's school friends (a smashing success except for the moment when I realized there were sugar ants in the cupcakes. Did I mention the friends with "cake ladies" were there?) and a family impromptu water fight last night. Taco dinner is postponed to tonight and peanut butter sandwiches were consumed yesterday as we spent all of dinner time waging a water war in our backyard.

I told Chris and Carolena that I want our house to stay clean all summer so that any time we ever want to invite friends over we can. So far so good. The goal is to have people over on a whim any time we feel like it. I see that Tuesday is Donald Duck's birthday and Thursday is Kamehameha Day (luau anyone?) and Sunday is National Bourbon Day and Strawberry Shortcake Day so it looks like we have a lot to celebrate just this week alone.

I plan for us to spend the summer with iced teas and mint juleps and lemonade and popsicles and cookouts and the bubble machine and good books and good friends and our back deck and the splash pad and the ymca and the beach and well... you get the picture. Join me if you're interested.

“This day was the first of many similar ones for the emancipated Mole, each of them longer and full of interest as the ripening summer moved onward. He learnt to swim and to row, and entered into the joy of running water; and with his ear to the reed-stems he caught, at intervals, something of what the wind went whispering so constantly among them.” The Wind in the Willows


Friday, June 5, 2015

Arise and Seize the Day!

Oh yeah, and did I mention this happened?!?!
Somehow I have seen not one, not two... but FOUR shows in Houston in the last six months. What?! I'm one highfalutin' son of a gun! Don't ask me how. Fortune found me. Fame just crowned me!
Carolena sings the next line to that song as "I'm the king of Newark!"It's just as amazing as you imagine it to be.
Speaking of things that are just as amazing as you imagine them to be... holy cow... NEWSIES! What a fantastic musical. Better than the movie. Wellllll... actually, let's get Christian Bale on the stage (shirtless *cough* who said that?!) and then we'll call it better than the movie.
  Remember when I was thisclose to meeting Christian Bale and then we moved?!?! *SIGH* 
Nights out with Kelly are more than fun. People around us cease to exist. Although they do actually still exist and probably think we are insane. I think the next time our husbands get us theater tickets
for a sister night they should also spring for a hotel so that we can stay up all night eating queso and singing showtunes. And guys, "this ain't just newsies no more." Next season I have one must see show: Cabaret! "We have no troubles here! Here life is beautiful... The girls are beautiful... Even the orchestra, is beautiful!"

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Trip Highlights

Our road trip was seriously one of the most fun trips ever. I could keep doing separate blog posts about each thing for a very long time. I guess I'll do a more condensed recap today so that I can move on with my blogging life.
Our first stop (and 10 days later the last) was Tyler, TX. Deep behind the Pine Curtain it is home to Tyler roses and that elusive furry hard to capture on camera mythical guy...
Uncle Hunter!
From there it was just a short drive to Little Rock where we dove headfirst into civil rights history at Little Rock's Central High School
And then it was on to Memphis! Where we ate barbeque and soul food, went walking on Beale Street, played by the Mighty Mississip, and absorbed more civil rights history at the Lorraine Motel.
From Memphis it was on to Saint Looey where we ate more bbq, rode to the top of the Gateway Arch, spent the day at Grant's Farms, had fun in City Museum, and went rollin on the river.
Riding to the top!
 

From St. Louis we had a Laura Ingalls Wilder day and went to Rocky Ridge and the Kansas Prairie. Man, Almanzo was pretty fabulous. That guy did farm work, built their house, made his own shoes, and hand hooked rugs in his down time. Geeze, all my husband does is anoint the sick and dying. Sheesh, man. Chris, I know what I'm getting you for Christmas...
So, in summary, we had a fantastic road trip and did way more than I can feasibly blog about. I have roadtrip fever now and we are in full-blown summer vacation mode around here!
If you are at the end of this and still reading... then you're probably related to me. Hi!

7 hours after posting this and hmmm... you know... I guess there was that time Chris built a deck and pergola onto our house... and the time I went out of town for the weekend and came back and he had cleaned all of the grout. Wow. Well Chris, start making your own shoes (moccasins!) and some fine rugs for our home and I'll continue feeding you so you hang around!

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

City Museum!

I've traveled to Jamaica, Canada, Belize, Norway, France, Spain, England, and Italy. I've been to 23 states and plan to hit all fifty - hopefully I'll make that goal sooner rather than later. I mention this to give context when I say that last week we went to St. Louis' City Museum and to quote Tommy Boy, "I swear I've seen a lot of cool stuff in my life... but that... was... AWESOME."
There is no way to fully describe how cool City Museum is. You really just have to go experience it. I can't wait to go back. I loved St. Louis. I plan to go back when our kids are older and we can explore the city a little deeper and stay up late for a baseball game. I would guess when we return we will plan for two days in City Museum. It's like the Magic Kingdom of St. Louis: we'll have to go early in the vacation because by the end we'll be ready to go back again.
City Museum... holy mackerel... so, as far as I could tell, pretty much anything there is fair game for an adventure. It isn't really a "museum" per se. It's a playground, fun house, mad house adventure into wonderland. Unless it explicitly said, "do not climb on" - you could climb it. A small hole in the wall might lead to a passageway. Sometimes I would find an entry way and realize I was too big to find where it led. I keep saying there were things like cages on the ceilings, but they weren't really cages:
 Do you see Chris in the picture above?
Perhaps cages" is the exact term for this. The ceilings were covered in these metal mazes and when you found an entryway you could just go up and crawl around. Eventually you would find a slide to get back out.
A tunnel would have a door in it that would lead to another tunnel. A hole in the floor would turn out to be a slide to the floor below... or perhaps the slide was longer than anticipated and you were going down more than one story. Chris went down a 10 story slide!
The record-holding world's largest pencil and world's largest pair of underwear reside there, which both turned out to be a "huge!" source of entertainment for Carolena.

There is a school bus hanging off the rooftop of this eleven story building...
that you can get in just to give your mother a heart attack...
Everywhere we looked there was something exciting to do. Slides, giant legos, huge chalkboard walls, a circus (yes, really), a kid-sized train that Carolena rode at least three times. Everything there was exciting and cool. And if it wasn't... then you just kept walking until you found something else that was.
While we were eating a pile of cheese fries someone crawling through a tunnel beneath our table reached out and grabbed my foot. Even having been warned by Chris to watch my feet, I let out a huge screech and jumped a mile. Moments later a gangly kid came and gave a giggling confession that it was he who had grabbed my foot. He was adorably proud. I'm glad my immediate reaction was to pull my leg away and scream so loudly.

There was more to do there than could be done in a day. We saw a one-woman circus performance (during which Carolena whispered to me, "I'm going to do that when I'm a grown up!"), and I got to run in a huge hamster wheel. In my humble opinion, I was amazingly good at it so let's add that to my resume when I return to the work force. Too bad we didn't get video or photo of that accomplishment. We ran around on skate park ramps,
rode a ferris wheel that overlooked the city (on top of the 14 story building!),
and generally ran amok.
 Did you spot Chris and Carolena in the photo above?
 City Museum, you are awesome. See you again in a few years!